From all of us here at Darkwater Syndicate, we hope you have a Happy Thanksgiving and wonderful holiday season.
Poems -- good or bad, you know 'em when you see 'em.
Part of our threefold mission here at Darkwater Syndicate is to bring you bad poetry. Now, there's a lot of bad poetry out there, but much of it was composed with the intent that it be good. Our bad poetry comes into being with the purpose of being bad. The ironic thing is that intentionally bad poetry is deceptively hard to write.
Ordinarily we excel at writing bad poetry, but sometimes we fail miserably at it and turn up with something that is passable, or -- dare we say -- even good. Shudder!
It's our great pleasure now to present you with a selection of the very best of our very worst poetry.
The Man In The Pinstripe Pants -- A perennial favorite. This free verse composition tells the story of a man who has risen to the pinnacle of greatness. Standing at the top of his office tower, he toes the edge and wonders whether it all was worth it.
Thirst Of The Oceans -- Much as the ocean may love someone, it must always be alone else the love affair turn deadly. Of all her fish and of all her whales she is intimately aware, but no one consoles her sorrows.
Open Closed Spaces -- Just when you thought you had it all figured out, things never are as they seem to be. The longest way around is the quickest way back to where you started.
The Music Box -- An old widow reflects on the time she spent with her husband, all the while listening to the tune of a music box he offered her as a wedding gift. Be careful with this one, it's a tearjerker.
Please feel free to comment, tweet, "Like" and et cetera, so we can keep bringing you more bad poetry.
We're excited to report that we'll be running our first ever guest author feature this Monday.
This piece, Mrs. Prendergast, was penned by Kathryn Rose Jacoby. Ms. Jacoby published her first novel Delores Fletcher, Cobweb Catcher in 2012. She resides in eastern North Carolina with her husband, Henry, and their maltipoo, two tabby cats, and the occasional wild rabbit.
Story by the author.
Connect with her:
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This one comes courtesy of Antonio Simon, Jr., author of "The Gullwing Odyssey". Check him out at GullwingOdyssey.com.
I am officially a nerd. I accept this.
Call me old-fashioned (I won't take offense), but I really like books. As in the sort you can hold in your hands. Sure, e-books are convenient, eco-friendly, and great in their own right, but there's something to be said about holding a book in your hands.
For starters, by reading physical books, you're participating in an ancient tradition. E-books and the gadgets that read them are relative newcomers to the scene. People have been writing things down onto papyri since around 2500 BCE, so that's four and a half millennia there. While I'm sure writing developed longer ago than just 4,000 years, the detail to note here is the medium employed -- papyrus and paper are easily transported, while stone or clay tablets are not. And let's not get started on cave drawings, which are altogether immobile. Generally, whenever somebody wrote something that he wanted somebody else to read, he wrote it on paper.
I've found I can make a deeper connection with the subject matter when I hold the book in my hands than when I read it on a screen. This is just my personal observation, but the concreteness of the medium (a physical book) helps make the subject matter more concrete (like the parallelism there?). With an e-book, you're one step removed. You're not getting the author's words directly anymore. Instead, the subject matter is electronic data which the e-book reader interprets and displays on your screen. A book is an unadulterated conversation between the author and the audience. With an e-book, the machine acts as a middleman, a filter. The connection becomes distant, cold.
I've also found that the physical act of reading focuses me on the fact that I'm reading. It's a contemplative exercise. In my experience, actually holding a book and turning the pages focuses me on what I'm reading. I find e-book readers can be distracting, especially when mine chimes in occasionally to advise of a new email.
E-books are great, but a bookshelf crammed with books is a whole lot more impressive than an e-book reader sitting on a coffee table, wouldn't you agree?
Are you an author? How would you like a publication credit to add to your résumé?
Submitting a short story to us is a great way to gain exposure for yourself and your work. If you've been following us from the beginning, you'll know that we run a weekly webzine, updated every Monday. Our mission is to be your source for uncommonly good reading. That's why our tagline is: "Quirky stories each week, bad drawings or poetry otherwise."
And now we want you! We're accepting submissions from fresh new voices and up-and-coming authors. Leave the bad drawings and bad poetry to us. We want short stories of up to 7,500 words. We're looking for works of fantasy, sci-fi, horror, comedy, and satire, but we're flexible on genre so long as the work is quirky, unorthodox, different, or otherwise "out there."
Our submission guidelines are up. You can use the form on that page to submit your entry for publishing consideration. If we select your work, we'll publish it on our website on an upcoming Monday.
Best of luck to you in all your authorial endeavors. Happy writing!
The secret's out: The Gullwing Odyssey is now available in paperback.
This is a beautiful looking-book. The front cover has been treated to an oil painting finish. Look closely and you can faintly see cracks in the cover image as though it were a 16th century painting -- completely appropriate, as that's the period the book is set in, the early age of sail. The spine and back cover have been treated to a rich royal blue color, befitting of the story's nautical theme. Of course, the spine proudly bears the Darkwater Syndicate logo.
Now that the book is in paperback, you can take Marco's misadventures anywhere you go -- the beach, the park, the morning commute. Just be careful of one thing: this book will make you laugh, and that may prompt others around you to read over your shoulder.
As an aside, it occurs to us that the punchline of one of the book's jokes has finally arrived. It was funny when the novel was an e-book, but it's even funnier now that the novel is in print. We won't spoil the joke for you, but everyone who's read the book knows what we mean.
It'll hit bookstores soon, so avoid the rush and get your autographed copy right here.
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